Saturday, May 16, 2009

My 1st Mother's Day

My first Mother's Day was incredibly special.  I woke up at Vince's first little squeak.  He wasn't ready to get up, but I was.  I went downstairs to get his bottle ready (the boy does not like to wait) and found cards and a gift bag waiting for me.  I suspected Anthony would give me a new and beautiful charm for my bracelet, and he did.  It was a tulip with a dangling aquamarine stone, Vince's birthstone.  I couldn't wait to read the cards, and wanted to read them all alone in case I cried.  Good thing, because the waterworks began as soon as I saw the envelope.  It said "Mom."  aaaahhhhh.  What a new feeling.  Someone in this world is going to call me Mommy.

For so many years, I dreaded Mother's Day.  Of course I wanted to celebrate my own mom and Ant's Mom, but it was my own self pity that overwhelmed me.  On top of everything, our Anniversary (10 years!) always falls on this weekend.  Everywhere we'd go, we'd be reminded of everything we wanted and for some reason couldn't have.  It was bittersweet.  But now, oh, now, everything is different, everything is better.  Everything is forgotten...well almost.  In some strange way, I am grateful for all the struggle, all the hurt, and all the waiting.  I believe it makes me a better mom and I don't take a single thing for granted.  My friend Melanie said it best:  God was saving Vincent just for us and waiting for just the right time.  Thank you Mel for finding the words I have been searching for.

Once when Uncle Tommy brought Gram and Papa out for a visit and we took the to the Grand Canyon, Gram looked out over the purple shadows of the sprawling canyon and wondered how anyone could see this and not believe there is a God.  Well, I look at Vincent's sweet face and wonder the same thing.

We spent the day at Mommo's and Boppo's house with Tom, Weez, James, Justin, and Weez's parents, Chris and Lorraine.  I held Vince for about 30 seconds  :)  Actually Vince slept most of the day.  James, 13, is very attentive to his cousin Vinny.  He kept a close eye on him and even fed him!  He's a natural and has us all impressed.  Later that day, we skyped with Babci, which is just the coolest thing ever.  That night I dressed Vince in a onsie that said "best gift ever."  The next day, it was back to normal, just Vincent and me, and it was Mother's Day all over again.

Happy Mother's Day! 

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